Nature versus Nurture

I think nature versus nurture is so controversial because, as humans, we really don't like to be told what to do.  We don't like to think that we're helpless, that every thing we do is controlled by some unchangeable force, that who we are has already been decided and we don't have a choice in the matter.  That's why 'both' is sometimes the most easily accepted answer.  We don't want to think that who we are is decided by how our parents treat/raise us- we want to be able to be different from that, change from that- but we don't want to think that these little things we're made up with but can't see have the end all be all decision on who we are either.